Parenting

I could write a book on poor parenting from personal experiences. I have had people - friends, family, law enforcement, acquaintances and strangers - tell me to my face, and of course behind my back, that I am a terrible parent since Marcie was 2 years old. There have been times I have believed it. Those were very dark days. 

It has taken me years to learn about TRUE PERFECT PARENTING. Here is my take on parenting:

I know my Heavenly Father is the only PERFECT PARENT. He loves unconditionally and is perfect, all-knowing and omnipotent. He presented a perfect plan for his spirit children and provided agency to each of them. He taught them what was right and what He wanted for them. It broke His heart when 1/3 of His children were banished FOREVER from his presence because of their choices made in heaven. He still loves them forever but is bound to their eternal punishment.

Now He agonizes over the choices of many of his children who have, are or will come to this earth and make bad choices. He has provided everything possible for success. He gives laws, commandments and rules. He provides a supportive structures to give needed guidance. He loves unconditionally.

But in the end, He will have even more of His precious children walk away from Him.

We, being imperfect, are learning to be parents. We are burdened with our own choices and consequences. And then we are given the responsibility of teaching and parenting our children/grandchildren/.......posterity.

It is the greatest of joys and the deepest of sorrow/despair. It is the greatest of personal rewards at times. It's rejuvenating at times. It is overwhelming at times. It seems hopeless at times. The triumphs sometimes seem small. 

But there is one who KNOWS exactly what we are going through - Heavenly Father.

Teaching our children (posterity) correct principles and then loving them unconditionally is our role as parents. Perfect parenting is not the end results of our children and their choices. Beating ourselves up for lacking the skills to deal with situations is natural but not necessary. There are plenty of people judging us and spreading gossip and lies. We must make sure we don't fall into that ugly pit of judging and gossiping about others!!! 

We must have faith and trust that Heavenly Father will guide us. That we will listen. And we will be able to endure the agency of our children for good or bad.

Long ago, I stopped praying for patience and changed it to understanding. Because of lack of understanding and shortness of vision, I would get frustrated and impatient. Finding understanding helps alleviates the stress of poor-parenting-guilt. 

This scripture has been my favorite since my sophomore year of high school when I memorized it. It has given me great comfort over the years since then.

"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thy own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths. Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the Lord, and depart from evil." Proverbs 3:5-7